Wednesday, August 21, 2013

WWE Main Event Results: August 21, 2013


The 47th edition of WWE Main Event came to you from the Rabobank Arena in Bakersfield, CA. The apparent personal security force for WWE Champion Randy Orton & The McMahon Family would be in action on Main Event as The Shield, United States Champion Dean Ambrose and WWE Tag Team Champions Seth Rollins s& Roman Reigns would face the high-flying trio of Kofi Kingston and Jimmy & Jey Uso in 6-Man Tag action.

Quick Results
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* 6-Man Tag: 
The Shield def. Kofi Kingston and Jimmy & Jey Uso by Dean Ambrose pinning Kofi Kingston following the Headlock Driver.

* Non-Title: 
AJ Lee (with Layla) def. Naomi (with Cameron) via black widow submission

* The Great Khali (with Hornswoggle & Natalya) def. Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter & Antonio Cesaro) via Khali Chop.

* Bray Wyatt def. Justin Gabriel via Sister Abigail


Detailed Results
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The show kicks off with the new hired guns of The McMahon Family, The Shield, as United States Champion Dean Ambrose and WWE Tag Team Champions Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns would face the randomly thrown together team of Kofi Kingston and Jimmy & Jey Uso in, you guessed it, a 6-Man Tag Match. At the end of a match that was longer than necessary, Dean Ambrose hits the Headlock Driver on Kofi Kingston en route to picking up the win for The Shield.

In the popcorn match/Total Divas promotional match of the night, the only Diva that really means anything in the WWE anymore from a wrestling standpoint, Divas Champion AJ Lee, with Layla in her corner, went one-on-one with one of the two cheerleaders that are more popular than the team they accompany, Naomi, with Cameron in her corner. In the end, it was Naomi tapping to the Black Widow submission hold of AJ Lee, securing the win for the Divas Champion.

The show then screeches to a halt with the arrival of the “yes, they’re still employed” trio of The Great Khali, Natalya, & Hornswoggle as Khali would face one-half of The Real Americans, Jack Swagger, with Zeb Colter & Antonio Cesaro in his corner. After Zeb Colter says some racist heel stuff in regards to all Indian people sounding the same and they all work for customer support, the match that nobody asked for gets underway. Because a seven-footer who can barely bend his knees is more marketable than Jack Swagger, Khali swats Swagger on the head en route to picking up the win.

After recapping everyone on what happened two nights ago on RAW and after Fandango & Summer Rae dance on the stage to taunt The Miz, it was time for the main event of the show as, for the third time this week, Bray Wyatt was in action as “The Eater of Worlds”, with Luke Harper & Erick Rowan in his corner, went one-on-one with everyone’s favorite Main Event jobber, Justin Gabriel. After a hetero kiss to Justin Gabriel’s forehead, Bray Wyatt would hit the Sister Abigail on Gabriel, provocatively covering Gabriel for the win. The off-hours Santa Clause then tells Justin Gabriel to “follow the buzzards”, kneeling at Gabriel’s side, flanked by Luke Harper & Erick Rowan.