Tuesday, May 7, 2013

WWE RAW Results: May 6, 2013


Thirteen nights before Extreme Rules, the 1041st edition of WWE Monday Night RAW came to you, live, from the Roanoke Civic Center in Roanoke, VA. The news broke on Monday afternoon on WWE.com that Brock Lesnar & Paul Heyman paid a “visit” to WWE Headquarters in Stamford, CT, where “The Beast” stomped through the Headquarters and into the office of his opponent at Extreme Rules, WWE COO Triple H. It was there that Lesnar completely destroyed the luxurious office of “The Game”, frightening everyone at the WWE Headquarters and, on RAW, Lesnar’s representative, Paul Heyman, will be on hand to show the exclusive footage of Brock Lesnar’s unexpected invasion of WWE Headquarters and his destruction of Triple H’s office property!

Quick Results
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* Randy Orton def. Damien Sandow via RKO.

* R-Truth def. Fandango by intentional count-out.

* Non-Title:
Alberto Del Rio def. Dolph Ziggler (with AJ Lee & Big E. Langston) by DQ after Big E. Langston pulls Alberto Del Rio out of the ring.

* 6-Man Tag: 
The Shield def. Kofi Kingston and Jimmy & Jey Uso by Dean Ambrose pinning Kofi Kingston following the Headlock Driver.

* Antonio Cesaro def. Zack Ryder via Neutralizer.

* 6-Diva Tag:
Kaitlyn & The Funkadactyls def. AJ Lee & The Bella Twins by Kaitlyn pinning AJ Lee following the Spear.

* Non-Title: 
Sheamus def. Wade Barrett via Brogue Kick.

* Ryback def. Kane via Shell Shocked.


Detailed Results
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Two weeks before he is scheduled to defend the WWE Championship against Ryback at Extreme Rules, RAW kicks off with WWE Champion John Cena, who lets everyone know that his injured Achilles tendon will not keep him from defending the WWE Title at Extreme Rules. Cena continues, saying that Ryback is “DTF” before joking about an altered photo that puts him with Betty White. Cena then says that he’s not a lawyer or a doctor, he is the WWE Champion and, as long as he is the champion, his job is to compete each and every week, admitting that he has not been 100% “since 2002”. The WWE Champion is then interrupted by the shrieking of RAW Managing Supervisor Vickie Guerrero, who says that she is so “excited” that John Cena will be able to defend the WWE Title at Extreme Rules. Vickie continues, saying that Extreme Rules is not an ordinary pay-per-view, it is an “extreme” pay-per-view and, as such, the WWE Championship match needs an extreme stipulation. The Managing Supervisor then says that she would not dare make a decision for an Extreme Rules stipulation without the input of both the champion and the challenger. With that, Vickie brings the #1 Contender for the WWE Title to the ring, Ryback, who enters the ring and comes face-to-face with “The Sin City Cyborg”.

Cena says that he wants to be “fair” to Ryback, pondering a match where the winner is the one who runs out of the arena screaming like a “little girl”, but admits that would be unfair to him since Ryback would win that one hands-down! Cena then suggests that they have a “whine-off”, doing his best Ryback impersonation, complete with snorting and heavy breathing. Cena then says that he does not care what type of match he and Ryback have at Extreme Rules, he just wants the chance to shut up the “world’s largest complainer”. Vickie admits that she is not happy with Ryback after he walked out on the scheduled main event of last week’s RAW, but says that, since Cena does not care about the stipulation, Ryback can pick whatever match type he wants!

Ryback tells the WWE Champion that, given his injury, it is “extremely stupid” of John Cena to give up the chance to name the Extreme Rules stipulation. Cena admits that it hurts for him to take a step, but if he were to take another one, it would hurt Ryback a lot more. Ryback immediately backs down, telling Cena to “take it easy”, saying that he has no intentions of fighting Cena tonight. Ryback continues, saying that he is “smart enough” to know when to walk away from a fight and Cena’s real “Achilles heel” is Cena’s “pride”, but come Extreme Rules, everyone will learn that “Ryback rules”. Ryback then makes his bold selection for the WWE Championship match at Extreme Rules, saying that their match will be a Last Man Standing Match, where the winner will be the man who leaves their opponent so beaten that they are unable to answer the referee’s ten-count!

After Damien Sandow dropped him with the Terminus on SmackDown while he was distracted by the presence of Big Show, “The Viper” Randy Orton would go one-on-one with Damien Sandow on RAW. In the end, it was Randy Orton hitting the RKO on Damien Sandow en route to picking up the win. After the match, Randy Orton was walking up the ramp, heading to the backstage area, but when “The Viper” nears the curtain, Big Show leads with his first, jacking Orton with the K.O. Punch, leaving Orton out on the stage!

After tossing Fandango off of the staging area before dancing with Fandango’s dance partner two weeks ago on RAW, six-time World Champion Chris Jericho makes an appearance on RAW. Jericho says that he has put together a “judge’s panel” to evaluate Fandango’s performance, saying that he scoured the WWE locker room to find some Superstars who know how to “shake some bootay”! With that, Chris Jericho brings out Tons of Funk, Brodus Clay & Tensai, who join Jericho at the special judging table, which is situated next to the RAW announce table.

With a judge’s panel consisting of Chris Jericho, Tensai, & Brodus Clay watching from their special table at ringside, Fandango was in action on RAW and, after his entrance, Jericho gives Fandango a “1”, while Tensai and Brodus Clay both gave Fandango a “2”! Fandango would then go one-on-one with a Superstar known for dancing himself, R-Truth. During the match, R-Truth would knock Fandango out of the ring before doing his own dance routine in the ring, which scores a “42” from Brodus Clay and a “10” from Tensai & Chris Jericho. Outraged, Fandango would grab his dance partner and walk away from the ring, giving R-Truth the win via count-out.

After being assaulted by The Shield on SmackDown, WWE Tag Team Champion Daniel Bryan spoke on the attack in a backstage interview on RAW, saying that he is going to prove that it takes more than an ambush from The Shield to keep him down. Bryan then says that he is going to challenge Ryback to rematch from SmackDown, but Ryback confronts Daniel Bryan, claiming that Bryan is in no condition to compete after the beating he suffered. Ryback then refuses Daniel Bryan’s challenge, saying that, even if Bryan was healthy, he would still “destroy” him, saying that Daniel Bryan is “half the man” that he is. Daniel Bryan’s tag team partner, Kane, then spins Ryback around, asking if Ryback thinks the same about him. Ryback tells Kane that “The Big Red Monster” is not the “monster” that he used to be, claiming that he is the only true monster in the WWE, saying “Ryback rules” before walking away from the WWE Tag Team Champions.

Thirteen nights before he defends the World Heavyweight Championship in Triple Threat Ladder Match against Alberto Del Rio & Jack Swagger at Extreme Rules, World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler, with AJ Lee & Big E. Langston in his corner, would go one-on-one with the man he cashed in on to become the champion in the first place, “The Mexican Aristocrat” Alberto Del Rio, with Ricardo Rodriguez in his corner, in a non-title match. In the middle of the match, Jack Swagger & Zeb Colter would march out to ringside, briefly coming face-to-face with Big E. Langston, opting to keep their distance as Colter sit down as guests on commentary while Swagger watches the match. Later on in the match, Alberto Del Rio would lock the cross armbreaker in on Dolph Ziggler, but AJ Lee would distract the referee and Big E. Langston would pull Del Rio out of the ring, tossing Del Rio into an unsuspecting Jack Swagger! An enraged Swagger then tosses Langston face-first into the steel ring post before knocking Del Rio down with a clothesline. Swagger then gets a ladder from under the ring, using the ladder as a javelin, pressing it on Ricardo Rodriguez’s chest, smashing him into the ringside barricade! Swagger then brings the ladder into the ring, swinging it at the skull of Dolph Ziggler, knocking Dolph out before doing the same to Del Rio!

After laying waste to WWE Tag Team Champions Kane & Daniel Bryan on SmackDown, the undefeated trio The Shield was in action on RAW as Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, & Roman Reigns would face the team of United States Kofi Kingston and Jimmy & Jey Uso in a 6-Man Tag Match. Kofi Kingston and The Usos would take it to The Shield, but when given the opportunity, Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns would take Jimmy & Jey Uso out on the outside, leaving Dean Ambrose to deal with Kofi Kingston and, after Rollins shoves Kofi off of the top rope, Ambrose hits the Headlock Driver on Kofi en route to pinning the United States Champion for the win, keeping The Shield undefeated!

After failing to regain the United States Title from Kofi Kingston on last week’s Main Event, only to assault Kofi and rip out one of his dreadlocks moments later, Antonio Cesaro went one-on-one with Zack Ryder on RAW. In the end, it was Antonio Cesaro putting Zack Ryder down with the Neutralizer en route to picking up the win. After the match, Antonio Cesaro asks if Zack Ryder is the best competition that the WWE has for him, calling it “ridiculous”. Cesaro continues, saying that he puts the “W” in WWE and there is nobody on RAW, SmackDown, Main Event, or in the WWE that can do what he does in the ring!

After he and his client, Brock Lesnar, invaded WWE Headquarters in Stamford, CT, destroying the office of WWE COO Triple H earlier in the day, Paul Heyman appears, live, via satellite, on RAW, but Heyman says that, instead of telling them what happened, he will show them via footage that he shot himself! Heyman then shows his footage, which begins with Paul Heyman saying that it is a “beautiful day” outside WWE Headquarters before showing Brock Lesnar standing next to him. With Lesnar walking into the lobby of the building first with Heyman in tow, narrating Lesnar’s “tour”. Heyman shows a blown-up version of the Extreme Rules poster and a special piece of decoration commemorating the late Andre The Giant, who Heyman says has been “dead for 150 years”. Lesnar & Heyman then informs the receptionist that they are heading to Triple H’s office and, when the receptionist asks if they have an appointment, Heyman claims that they got an “email” asking them to be there. With Lesnar breathing down the neck of a Headquarters employee, Heyman says that they are heading to the fourth floor and the nervous employee presses the appropriate buttons to take them there. The employee then quickly gets off on his floor before Heyman & Lesnar arrive on the fourth floor. With Heyman leading the way, they pass the poster for the Royal Rumble, which features The Rock as Brock briefly stops to stare at his former rival. As the duo continue to make their way towards Triple H’s office, Heyman mentions that there are no photos of Brock Lesnar hanging on the walls, a tidbit that Lesnar takes notice of. Heyman says that Lesnar is a multiple time WWE Champion, but still has no poster hanging up in the building. Heyman then peeks into the office of a Headquarters employee, saying that he has never seen either of the two workers in there before. Heyman then asks, out loud, if anybody of importance works at the Headquarters on a Monday afternoon before loudly calling out “hello” throughout the vacant hallway.

Brock Lesnar & Paul Heyman then finally arrive at Triple H’s office as they let themselves in, surprising two of the employees that work outside of Triple H’s office. Heyman comments that Triple H’s receptionist is much “prettier” than Triple H’s wife, Stephanie McMahon. The male employee in the room takes the bold move of standing up and telling Lesnar & Heyman that they can’t go into Triple H’s office, but Lesnar puts his hands on the employee, taking the employee’s head in his hand and forcing him back into his seat, telling him to “sit down and shut up”. Lesnar & Heyman then enter the office of WWE COO Triple H, which has photos and memorabilia from Triple H’s legendary career throughout it. Brock then grabs the special replica of the World Heavyweight Title of Triple H’s as Heyman tells Brock that Brock will never have a shot at a championship as long as Triple H is in a decision-making position. Brock then slings the title belt over his shoulder, taking it upon himself to sit in the COO’s chair. Brock then commences the destruction as Lesnar snaps Triple H’s laptop in half, doing the same to Triple H’s keyboard, punching the computer monitor off of the desk as well. “The Beast” then grabs the sledgehammer that Triple H had hung on is wall, using the weapon to literally smash the replica title and the COO’s desk to pieces, breaking the sledgehammer in half in the process! Brock then hurls a chair, a lamp, and even a huge TV at the WWE logo adorned on the wall! Brock then knocks over Triple H’s bookshelf as Heyman says that the destruction reminds him of what Triple H is going to look like after their Steel Cage Match at Extreme Rules. Heyman then tosses his business card onto the pile of destruction before Brock comments, “job well done”, leaving the office with the sledgehammer handle in-hand.

Amused by the footage he just presented to the world, Paul Heyman, saying that he knows more than a little bit about the word “extreme” and he is always the one who “pleads” with Brock Lesnar, saying he often has to “discourage” Brock. Heyman continues, saying that, after Triple H hit him with the Pedigree a couple of weeks ago, he made the decision that he is no longer going to discourage Lesnar from causing mayhem and destruction, he is going to “encourage” it! Heyman then shows the World Heavyweight Title belt replica from Triple H’s office, which is now concaved in the center! Heyman continues, saying that he is going to “beg” Brock Lesnar to exploit the Steel Cage Match to “maim” Triple H, saying that Brock is going to take Triple H “to the extreme”, but Lesnar will go “further and further” than that!

Paul Heyman’s threats are then interrupted by the arrival of “The Game” Triple H in the arena as Heyman’s angry face is shown on the Tron as Triple H makes his entrance! Triple H then addresses Paul Heyman & Brock Lesnar, asking Heyman if he ever opens his mouth without “crap” falling out. Triple H then says that he knows a thing of two about “extreme”, saying that he “tore through the Attitude Era with an iron fist” and he is also the man who knocked Brock out at WrestleMania. Triple H continues, saying that he does not believe for a second that Lesnar & Heyman went to WWE Headquarters on a Monday afternoon actually expecting “The Game” to be there, saying that the world knows damn well that he is always present at Monday Night RAW! Heyman tries to comment, but Triple H tells Heyman to “shut up”, saying that he has “two offices” and, while Brock destroyed one office, he is standing in his other office. Triple H then says that the office he stands in now is where he became a “man”, which is something that Lesnar has never become. Triple H then dares Lesnar to say something to his face, saying that he is “not hard to find” before saying that, if Brock is thinking that he is going to walk into his current office, his “home”, and try to do the same thing he did to the office at WWE Headquarters, then he and the office will“fight back”!

The Divas were in action on RAW as Divas Champion Kaitlyn teams The Funkadactyls to face the #1 Contender for the Divas Title, AJ Lee, and The Bella Twins in a 6-Diva Tag Match. After The Bella Twins refused to be tagged into the match, AJ Lee was the victim of the Spear by Kaitlyn en route to the Divas Champion pinning the #1 Contender to pick up the win for herself and The Funkadactyls.

After twice being embarrassed by Sheamus last week, “The World’s Strongest Man” Mark Henry appears on RAW, saying that Sheamus is going to come out there and beat his chest and do his Celtic pose. Mark Henry then says that he does not need to pretend to be tough because he is tough before Henry shows what he did to Mark Henry twice a few weeks ago when he attacked “The Celtic Warrior” in the backstage area. “The World’s Strongest Man” then says that, if Sheamus has any “pride” in his body, then Sheamus will face him at Extreme Rules! Mark Henry says that it has been a long time since he has gone “extreme” before he promises Sheamus that people will remember their Extreme Rules match for “the rest of existence”! Sheamus then interrupts Mark Henry’s speech, showing his embarrassment of Mark Henry last week, but Henry tells Sheamus that he better be “serious” come Extreme Rules. Sheamus says that he is a “relaxed” type of guy, but at Extreme Rules, his “business” is Mark Henry. Henry then says that they don’t have to wait until Extreme Rules, but before the two big men could square off, Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett comes out for his scheduled match with Sheamus!

With Mark Henry a guest on commentary, “The Celtic Warrior” Sheamus would go one-on-one with Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett in a non-title match. During the match, the fight would spill to the outside and Sheamus looked like he was going to toss Wade Barrett into the seated Mark Henry, but Sheamus fakes Henry out, resulting on Mark Henry falling out of his chair! As if that was not enough, Sheamus blasts Mark Henry with the Brogue Kick on the outside before turning his attention back to Wade Barrett. In the end, it was Sheamus hitting the Brogue Kick on Wade Barrett en route to pinning the Intercontinental Champion for the win. Immediately after the match, Mark Henry would enter the ring with a belt in his hand, repeatedly whipping Sheamus in and out of the ring with the leather belt before squashing “The Celtic Warrior” with the World’s Strongest Slam on the arena floor!

Then it was time for the main event as, after being attacked and laid out by The Shield on SmackDown, one-half of the WWE Tag Team Champions, Kane, would go one-on-one with the #1 Contender for the WWE Title at Extreme Rules, “The Sin City Cyborg” Ryback. In the end, Ryback was able to prevent Kane from coming off of the top rope with his signature clothesline. Instead, Ryback would use the advantage of Kane being perched up on the top turnbuckle to put Kane on his back, dropping “The Big Red Monster” with Shell Shocked en route to picking up the win! After the match, The Shield made their way through the crowd with their sights set on Ryback, but Daniel Bryan would come out, willing to put his issues with Ryback aside to help “The Sin City Cyborg” combat The Shield. However, once Daniel Bryan arrived in the ring, Ryback would exit the ring, keeping his distance, but before The Shield could get their hands on Daniel Bryan, John Cena rushes out, ready to back Daniel Bryan up! However, when The Shield enters the ring, Ryback returns to the ring with a steel chair, using it to keep Dean Ambrose & Seth Rollins from entering the ring. Daniel Bryan then dives to the outside, taking out Ambrose & Reigns as, in the ring, John Cena hoists Roman Reigns up, ready to deliver the Attitude Adjustment, but Ryback uses the steel chair on Cena, driving it into the mid-section of the WWE Champion! Ryback then delivers a steel chair shot to the back of Cena before standing tall over the fallen champion.